“Never confuse devotion with emotion. The Bible measures love, not in tingles per second, but in putting one’s life on the line (1 John 3:16-18)” – Grantley Morris
Sometimes if I’m honest I tend to judge my relationship with God a little unfairly. For example there are times where I don’t feel like raising my hands in worship, but I feel guilty only because everyone around me is. Or people are very demonstrative i.e. crying while singing, or speaking in tongues during prayer and my relationship with God isn’t like that. Am I the only one that does that? I think it is easy to look at your relationship with Jesus and compare it to what you see around you. It’s part human nature and part the enemy whispering things in your ear to cause you to self-doubt. It’s like the famous quote “Comparison is the thief of Joy”. And it really is true.
We’re all on our own spiritual journeys with Jesus. If we were meant to be on the same journey, well, God would make us the same way and speak to us the same way. But amazingly He wants us to have our own separate relationships with Him. And also luckily He is interested in the condition and motivation of our hearts instead of the outward appearance.
I remember a while ago “The Five Love Languages” was big in the Christian world. I never read the book but out of interest I wanted to see if there was a quick quiz online to reference and because of the magical wonder that is the internet, of course there was. I didn’t want to sign up so I just skipped the field with name and email.
For Singles: http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/singles/
For Husbands: http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/husbands/
For Wives: http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/wives/
My scores and explanations are below:
Your Scores (out of a possible 12):
6: Words of Affirmation
10: Quality Time
0: Receiving Gifts
5: Acts of Service
9: Physical Touch
In Quality Time, nothing says “I love you” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes you feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed activities, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful. Whether itʼs spending uninterrupted time talking with someone else or doing activities together, you deepen your connection with others through sharing time.
A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, and thoughtful touches on the arm—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive. Appropriate and timely touches communicate warmth, safety, and love to you.
Words of Affirmation
Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten. You thrive on hearing kind and encouraging words that build you up.
Acts of Service
Can helping with homework really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most wants to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter. When others serve you out of love (and not obligation), you feel truly valued and loved.
Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures. Gifts are heartfelt symbols to you of someone else’s love and affection for you.
I couldn’t agree more actually. I enjoy quality time more than anything. And nothing bothers me more than when people push off spending time with me, or when I meet someone new and they do not make eye contact or seem disinterested in being around me. Physical touch is also big. If I like you I will want to hug you. The end.
Now while it’s always fun to take a quiz there is a reason why I posted that. 1. Because we all respond to things differently 2. If we all have our love languages with people, wouldn’t that also be true when it comes to our relationship with God?
If ever you find yourself comparing yourself to how others love God or worse yet (guilty) questioning God’s individual love for you you have to remind yourself that we are all different and He knows what love language we need to be spoken to in. Also since we are made in His image he also desires to be pursued and understood by us as well.
The facts are that:
- God loved us so much He sent His Son to die in our place (1 John 4:10).
- There is nowhere we can go where His presence is not with us (Psalm 139:7-11).
- Nothing can separate us from the love of God (Romans 8:38-39).
- He has always loved us and always will. (Jeremiah 31:3)
Prayer: Thank you that You are always with me and have chosen me as Your child. Jesus help me to grow in my comprehension of Your love for me. If ever I find myself judging my relationship with you based on my assumptions of relationships around me, remind me who I am to You and that our relationship is set apart and special in and of itself. Continue to show me our love language so that I am secure in where I stand in Your eyes. Amen.