I saw this quote online over a week ago but it came to light actually during church yesterday. I was singing on stage and this person in the audience made eye contact with me and my stomach sank. It looked like someone I knew from my past. Logically I knew this couldn’t be so, but when I would look away and focus on singing I would still get the feeling I was being looked at–and sure enough if I looked back the stare was there. Have you ever experienced this? Seen someone you once knew, or seen someone who looks exactly like that person, and you’re like CRAP I don’t want to ever have memories of this person or my past be brought up again?
I know the enemy loves to play this game and it’s awful and awkward. It actually makes perfect sense to me why the enemy would want to mess with someone like this..especially in church. I’m in a moment of praise and worship to God, I’m happy and in my own moment and boom! There is a stone thrown to break my concentration. I didn’t dwell too much on it but I consciously said to myself–whether it is that person or not I will not allow myself to feel ashamed. I will not cower on stage. I will not let the enemy win. I raised my hands even more frequently and even smiled at one point as if to say “Satan you’re a jerk and you’re not pulling one over on me today. You’re not invited into this moment or my mind. You’re not going to win today.”
It’s important to remember that we are in a battle over our minds. Even though we have been redeemed and are paid for by Jesus, Satan wants nothing more than to make us question our relationship with God and our own self-worth. Because of that we should dress daily in our God armor:
Ephesians 6:10-18 (MSG)
A Fight to the Finish
10-12 And that about wraps it up. God is strong, and he wants you strong. So take everything the Master has set out for you, well-made weapons of the best materials. And put them to use so you will be able to stand up to everything the Devil throws your way. This is no afternoon athletic contest that we’ll walk away from and forget about in a couple of hours. This is for keeps, a life-or-death fight to the finish against the Devil and all his angels.
13-18 Be prepared. You’re up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it’s all over but the shouting you’ll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them. You’ll need them throughout your life. God’s Word is an indispensable weapon. In the same way, prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open. Keep each other’s spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out.
It’s important to remember this verse. It’s important to remember that God’s word is true and if he has cast all of your inadequacies and mistakes away, Satan is unable to scoop them up again. It’s important to remember that you are a child of God and no amount of harassment and bullying will change that. It’s important to remember that God has given you His spirit and you can live in peace knowing that He has gone before you and you don’t need to fear.
I pray that God continue to fortify my mind against any attacks from the Enemy. I pray for your mind as well. I’m proud that I’ve grown over the years and instead of wallowing in self-pity or shame or anything else like I so often did before, I recognize that the Enemy’s voice is untrustworthy. It is not the final word. It is not necessary to pay attention to. It’s like a heckler in the crowd. White noise in the background. It is extremely important not to give it more ground than deserved in your life. We are able to walk with our head held high, no matter what is thrown in our path.
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